Your job is what you do, not who you are.

A year ago I subscribed to two magazines; Conde Nast and Travel & Leisure. I’m not really sure why to be honest. Maybe it was a secret voice pulling me to the unknown. It is funny what you put in the universe and how it circles back.

So here we are on the eve before our great adventure to Europe and Asia. My husband and I will live in London for four months and travel our hearts out. It’s more than I ever could have imagined. For the first time in my life I’m letting go of the idea of having one purpose in life. What does this mean? I’ve spent most my adulthood trying to define myself by my career. Which has always been, “to be a successful actor.”

Which brings me to: What is the first question a stranger will ask you when they meet you??

(The conversation usually goes like this for me)

Stranger: What do you do?

Me: I’m an actor

Stranger: What have you been in?

(Which is the worst question a person can ask me, because the first thing that comes to mind and to most non-famous actors is: Well, a shit ton, but I’m sure you have not seen any of it!  So I’ll just say some lame response like……..)

Me: Nothing you would know.

Then without fail, I get this look of disappointment and I’m left feeling terrible. It’s nothing they did, of course, it’s just my own insecurity. It highlights the pre-conceived idea, that to not be known for something, means I am nothing or, to not be making great money from it… means the work I’ve done is worthless.

I imagine other people feel this kind of shame around career. We compare ourselves to others. You’re not where you thought you’d be. You thought you’d have got a promotion by now. You’d thought you’d have changed jobs by now. Whatever it is, we all have our struggles and disappointments. But so what! You get up each day and you try. That in my opinion is worth a lot.

I guess what I’m wondering is; what if we were more interested in what made each other happy. What If we stopped trying to define each other by the jobs we do, but more by what we were inspired by? What would change? What would change for you? How would you feel if someone asked you what are you excited by right now? Like my Mom is legit obsessed with this weird class she’s taking on the medical benefits of Marijuana (Yes, she lives in Denver.) I love listening to her talk about it. Or my brother, he’s taking up Salsa classes with his kickball team which is about as random as it gets.

And me… well I’m inspired by this blog, and traveling. I love listening to people’s stories and exploring new places.

I guess what I’m learning, (well, trying to accept) is; when people ask me what I do, it doesn’t have to be this one all-encompassing thing. I can be an actor. I can be a life coach. I can travel and blog about my adventures. I can be obsessed with Hello-Fresh and cooking. I don’t have to be defined by my career or a paycheck.

Yes I’m an actor… I will always be an actor. But I’m a whole lot more than that too.

And so are you.

It’s remembering that your life’s definition is the one you write for yourself, not the one you were told it was supposed to be.

Be it all.

 

 

***Follow my journey the next few months. I’m hoping to have lots of tips and of course tons of stories tell. NEW BLOG ON BRAZIL COMING SOON****

10 thoughts on “Your job is what you do, not who you are.

  1. Rachel, I look forward to reading about your adventures! Go, enjoy the world with your husband. I journal when I travel since they didn’t have blogs when I started. Hopefully I will pick up some tips from you for our future trips. Have fun, (Stephanie’s mom) Barbara Fabris

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